Why Do Children Bully

Why Do Children Bully?

There are many reasons children bully others. They can have strained home lives, not be getting enough attention at home, or have other family issues. Children who come from abusive homes or whose parents use violence to solve problems also may bully others. The most commonly thought of reason why a child bullies others is because they have low self esteem or a poor self image but many times bullies are confident and popular and pick on children who are smaller and unpopular. Children may also bully because they witness violence at home or do not know any other way to deal with stress. If children are not taught the proper way to solve problems, they may resort to violence and bullying. Bullying is a serious issue that can have serious consequences and should be treated as such.

Other reasons children bully are to compensate for their own problems, to gain a feeling of power, or to make themselves feel better. They turn to bullying as a way to solve these problems because it seems like the best way. Being mean spirited or emotionally unstable are also reasons a child would bully because bullying is actually enjoyable to them. Children may find happiness in the misery of others. If children have learning problems, poor social skills, or problems fitting in they may also bully others to make themselves feel better about their social situation.

Sometimes the reason children bully is because they are being picked on themselves and they will retaliate by bullying others. This is a common way that the cycle of bullying continues and that children who would not normally bully others start to do so. No reason merits bullying, but some children don't know any other way to deal with their problems.

The most important thing to remember when dealing with a child that bullies is that their motive may be different from the norm and the underlying problem must be resolved in order to stop the bullying cycle. The reason children bully is the key to stopping them, so if your child is a bully make sure you identify exactly why they feel as though they should bully others. Solving the underlying problem will give children the relief from their problems they need without having to resort to bullying. Give your child positive ways to deal with problems and stress so they don't have to use bullying. Children who are stopped quickly are much less likely to suffer from long term effects of bullying.

Stopping bullying is important not only for the victims of bullying but also for the bullies themselves. Children who bully often have problems later in life and end up committing crimes and continuing their cycle of aggression. Stopping a bully while they are young and making them realize the consequences of their actions is important to prevent future trouble. No matter why children bully, they should be made aware that bullying is not acceptable and given better ways to cope with their problems. Make sure you address the problem that is causing the bullying so that it doesn't continue.


There are many resources to assist both victims of bullying and parents/guardians of those who may be exhibiting signs of bullying behaviors.